Wednesday, December 17, 2008

American Idol Dies!


Ok..Not the singing T.V. show- but yet another American Idol- or icon rather- died last week. I love all the old pinups and Olivia drawings of Bettie Page. I grew up sneeking peeks at her re-printed "bondage" trading cards my friends had, as well as some old 8mm film recordings of stripteases. Not Only a sex-symbol, Bettie could also be considered to be a frontrunner in the women's liberation movement. She is alwyas seen as a woman who took charge of her sexuality, and brought it into the limelight.






















She died of a heart-attack while under a pneumonia-enduced coma. There are rare photos of her in her later stages of life, because she discouraged the taking of them, being quoted as saying "I want people to remember me as beautiful as I was."



Sexy, notorious, deviant, or empowering, however you think of her- she WILL be missed.

We love you, Bettie!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Times are-a-changin'....


I know a lot of us have been hit hard by the current economy crisis-'es'. My wife just lost her marketing executive job, forcing her to re-take her old job back at the phone-banks. She now makes LESS money than my "supplemental" job. I know, we are lucky to have ANY jobs at ALL right now, and I AM thankful for that much.
But the one thing that heart-wrenching to me because of this, is we had to pull our 14-month-old daughter, Emaline, out of her Daycare. luckily, Grandma & Grandpa live 15 mins away, and they accepted taking care of her. Again, yes, I am counting my blessings in this current economic bad time.

What makes it so sad for me (well, US really) Is the daycare she was in was more like a "school", or pre-school than just a "daycare". She would make little paper projects, or play duck-duck goose (in a slooow, wobbly, toddling way of course) with all of her friends there. The main reason we put her into this type of daycare was not JUST for someone to 'keep her from dying' as we worked our full-time jobs, but also to socialize her with other kids, and get her used to a "school" environment (ok, and build her immune system with a million snotty kids around her too -LOL). But now, She's back at Grandma's.

DON'T get me wrong- my parents are WONDERFUL in helping to raise her, and they DO follow our "rules" (with a grain of salt of course) in how we like to raise our own daughter. But at Grandma's house, there is only one neighbour kid roughly her age, and shes gone most of the day in her own daycare, so they hardly meet.
So gone is Emma's friends, her teachers, and the kid that bites her from time to time. (Ok THAT I wont miss.)

Grandma and Grandpa will now do their best not to let her little just-walking feet touch the ground, and Kim & I have to UN-spoil her every evening. Not that the daycare ladies didn't take a liking to Emma and spoil her there too- but now she is the ONLY kid around lavish attention is being heaped on to.

I really hate having to pull her away from somewhere she likes to go every day. She will like Grandma's too- but leaving all your friends at any age is hard, especially at her age, when by the time we are making good enough money again to afford her going back, she won't remember anyone, and will have to start all over.

I know, if THIS is my biggest bitch about the job-switch and crappy economy that I have, then it must seem to a lot of less-well-off people that I should gag on whatever silver spoon they see in my mouth. I am solidly in the middle class, and I see now that yes, WE are the ones hardest-hit. We still make too much money to qualify for ANY financial assistance of ANY kind, yet, we can barley afford the mortgage and food on our table with TWO jobs- and we do NOT live in a huge house. So, what does one do of our economic status?

Work harder.
Wait.
Hope.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Obama, or not Obama- that is the question...


Well folks- Here comes a political plea from a non-political guy.

First of all, if you're voting for McCain, you don't have to read any farther- I'm not here to try and sway YOU guys and gals.

However, if you're voting for someone else OTHER than Obama OR McCain- PLEASE VOTE OBAMA!

I will tell you why. I personally, usually, vote independent. Not because I'm making a statement, it's just because one of the independents usually are closer to what I want to see in government.

However, with this election- since the republican or democratic nominee has a 95%+/- chance of being the next president: If you wanted to vote for Hillary, but don't like Obama and wont vote for him, OR if you're not voting for Obama for any other reason- YOU ARE ELECTING MCCAIN. 4 MORE YEARS OF A GEORGE BUSH-LIKE GOVERNMENT.

It's time for change. Yes, I know you want to make your voice heard, or you are upset at not getting Hillary, or you're upset in general at the democratic party and didn't like any of the canidates or their issues- but this is NOT the year to try and make our individual voices heard. We need to stand together as a collective and make sure the G.W.Bush Regime is cancelled before it's carried on by McCain! I'm NOT saying pull an entire democratic ticket vote- By all means vote for the other offices how you see fit- but for president- VOTE OBAMA PLEASE.

I want someone, ANYONE other than McCain in office. HOWEVER, if we don't all band together and vote for the ONLY candidate on the upcoming ticket with ANY chance of wining- McCain WILL be in-- and then I don't want to hear ANY of you b**ching about it for the next four years, when you could have done something about it NOW. :)

Please pass this on to all of your friends who aren't voting for McCain OR Obama already!

I am Eric Craig, and I approve this message! ;)

Thursday, August 14, 2008

New Paranormal website!




Yes, this is shameless self-promotion from good 'ol Eric, but, too bad. LOL

I started a new website-
the Paranormal Evidence Archive.

I will be collecting pics, video, audio, and weblinks on ANY and all paranormal activities. Meaning, not only Ghosts, but Bigfoot, Faeries, UFO's, and anything else, well, PARA-normal. ;) Don't worry, I'll sift thru things personally and decide if they should be posted or not. I can spot fakes or "iffy" pics pretty well. (20+ years of digital photo editing and photography experience)

If YOU have any pics, video or audio, please email it to me at ercinc1@gmail.com
I WILL give credit for any evidence I collect. Please include time & place along with it. If you PERSONALLY didnt obtain the evidence, PLEASE include where you DID get it from.

ALSO- if you have any favorite paranormal sites on the net, send me the link- I'll give you credit.

If you are a member of ANY local (Indiana-ish) Paranormal group and would like to link to my site- send me your url and I will blog it in and promote you!

Why am I doing this? well, I have too many friends across TONS of different groups, that I could never personally join just ONE, so I want to be the "hub" (on the web, at least, without being in a silly "webring" LOL). And, I see a lot of good evidence on different group sites, but it takes a lot of time and searching on the web to find them all, I wanna help narrow that time down a bit.

Feel free to pass and post this email on to anyone or any group who might be interested as well- THANX!!

Eric Craig
http://p-e-archive.blogspot.com

Monday, August 4, 2008

The Haunted Story Inn




Well, we had a great vacation! Yeah, I know the last thing you wanna hear is how someone else had a good time on days off from work that you don't have. Well, at least I'm not busting out the slide projector. :P

Friday (July 25th) A.M., we left home and drove to Richmond Indiana to drop the kid of at Grandmas. Yaay! Mommy & Daddy time! LOL
We then took off for French Lick, Indiana. It took us a good 3 hrs to get there, but the GPS we borrowed from Kim's parents helped. Kim is in a bellydance troupe, and they were performing at an outdoor festival a few miles west of French lick. We busted out the tent and camped there until Sunday morning. (it was TOO damn hot to camp, in case you were wondering). Kim was awesome in her dance routine!

Sunday we packed up, and drove up to Nashville, IN. (Just east of Bloomington, in Brown County.) There we stayed at the haunted Story Inn (pic above). I HIGHLY recommend it if you want a little out-of-the-way bed-and-breakfast, but still near enough to drive for all kinds of shopping and Brown County activities. They have kept all of the exterior 'old-tyme' decor, but the interior accommodations are excellent! They also have a famous 5-star restaurant on the ground floor. I know it doesnt look like it from the outside, but this is "fine dining" at some of it's best. We had scallops the size of hockey pucks! Most of the food they serve (except for the seafood and tropical fruits) are either grown in their own huge botanical gardens out back, or bought locally- INCLUDING the bison and chicken eggs!
As for being haunted- Kim and I stayed in the "Blue Lady" room, supposedly the room with the most activity from several of the ghosts in the area. Honestly, we didn't get bad feelings, nor did we see anything the entire time- HOWEVER, something strange did happen on our second day. We came back from an early dinner in Nashville, and decided to take a nap before we woke up and tried to contact the "Blue Lady" to see if anything would happen. Suddenly, a loud CLICK-CLACK came from inside our room while we were napping on the bed- it startled both of us awake. For the next half-hour I went around the room, rapping and dropping items to try and reproduce the sound we heard. Finally I hit on it- In the room, there is an old vanity with a huge mirror on it. The vanity has a glass top to it. On the glass top (for decor) they have an old time silver hairbrush and handmirror set lying there. When i picked up the hairbrush and dropped it back on the glass from the height of about a half-inch, i got the exact noise we heard! (Interestingly the handmirror when dropped made a different sound). I shook the vanity to see if it was wobbly, but no- it was very sturdy. The glass top itself wasn't loose either. I even tried jumping on the floor near it- but nothing happened. Only when I picked up the hairbrush about a half-inch and dropped it did I get the sound. Nashville was beautiful, and it was fun shopping and all, but the haunted Story Inn is what I'll remember most!
Kim and I are definately going back! Anyone wanna get a group together and do some ghost-hunting on a 3-day weekend sometime???

Monday, July 14, 2008

P*rn in 5 clicks?

I truly believe that porn is 5 clicks (or less) from ANY website, even religious ones. Now, I'm all for the sexual enjoyment of consenting adults to do and see what they want. But I don't want it coming to MY email box. If I wanna see it, I'll go look for it.

Who else wants to see an end to spam? And I believe it can happen. All we have to do is start a national "do-not-email" list, kinda like the don't call one. An advertiser just has to run that email list thru their bots before spamming, and bingo- no more spam for you if you're on the list.

I'm not naive, i do realise that there's ways to send emails and mask who it's from. This is where the law comes into play. MAKE all ISP's and the like directly responsible for any spam emanating from their servers. They will whine "well, we cant control what people send out!"- no they cant, but they can discover who sent what message -if the police came to them with a spam message, they can find the person who sent it, because they have to be logged on and registered with their ISP to send it, and then make THEM responsible.

Ok- what about the people who bounce ISP's? then EASY- make the company who's product/services being advertised responsible as well- and then shut them down for unsolicited mailing.

Now, a lot of people will scream "privacy rights!" and "anonymity will be gone!" However, if my daughter opens up a email in our family email account, and suddenly t*ts or p*ssy pops out at her in a photo or "click here for penis enhancement" link takes her directly to a site with not only penis enhancing, but links to other porn sites?, that kind of ad invasion is WORSE than an annoying telephone call during dinner- so WHY don't we have a "do not email" list????????

And also- wouldn't that be the advertiser allowing a minor to see pornography? Isn't that illegal already???- how does the spammer know the person at the other end of the email is 1- over 18(21), and 2- WANTS to see it? Why is this still legal??? Bars have to physically card people because of age-restrictions. Why do porn-spammers not have to? (I'm not talking about the "click her if over 18" websites- I'm talking about the porn that comes DIRECTLY to your inbox!)

And no- not all spam filters will catch all of that kind of crap delivered to your mailbox, so the companies cannot claim that I'm "not doing everything in my power to filter our email", when it doesn't work that way.

I cant tell every single ad company in the world that I want to opt out when there are new ones every day. DO NOT COME TO ME IF I DON'T ASK FOR IT. There needs to be a world-wide opt-OUT list.

simple as that.
Who's with me?

Monday, June 16, 2008

MOVIE REVIEW: Iron man & Hulk







I saw a couple of movies (within a few weeks of each other) that are slowly being linked together- I'll get to that later. (see "TOGETHER" below) But first: (don't worry, no spoilers)...


IRON MAN


Awesome. Go see it. Seriously, it captures the essence of the character (some liberties were taken with back story, of course, but as in the case of the X-Men movies, I didn't mind so much!), while delivering a great movie to people who don't know Iron Man as well.


At first, I was like- Robert Downey Jr? As Tony Stark? Really? Are they kidding??? But you know what- he did an EXCELLENT job! The acting was superb, the effects were not too over the top, (altho I had a few flashbacks to 'The Rocketeer' movie LOL), and it kept your interest the whole time. Good to take the kids to- most all of the violence was aimed at men in Iron Suits.


For all you die-hard fans, Keep an eye out for the silver Iron Man suit in a quick and funny scene.


HULK (2008)


Oh thank you! Hulk has been saved! After that awful 2003 Ang Lee version, I had my doubts that the Hulk would ever make another screen appearance. But, lo! And Like the current incarnation of Batman, it's a darker, grittier Hulk than the Saturday morning cartoons. Again, I was like- Ed Norton? the Hulk? Really? Seriously??? But as before, I have been humbled by the performance and fit that the actor brings to the Hulk. Even though they took small licences with the origins of the Hulk, they stayed true to the original character, and even payed homage to the TV show and comics: In one scene, Bruce's girlfriend buys him giant purple stretch pants to wear so he wont rip up his clothes. in another scene- Lou Farigno makes a brief appearance as a security guard. There are other bits and pieces thru the whole movie too.


But don't let the tongue-in-cheek bits fool you. If you are wary of too-violent movies, better think twice before taking the kids to this one. While no "gore" is shown, people DO get killed, both by the Hulk and his nemesis "The Abomination". Lots of collateral damage, explosions, and things getting punched and smashed make this a true-to-form Hulk movie, but something parents might want to avoid if they don't want their 5 year old emulating the big green guy.


TOGETHER:


Ok- without saying too much about the actual scenes- there are 2 scenes that LINK the Hulk movie with the IRON MAN one (and methinks other MARVEL movies coming out soon will have some linking scenes too!). The scenes are just BEFORE the credits in the Hulk, but you have to wait until AFTER the credits in Iron Man. I cant say much more and not spoil the scenes, but I will let you know what i think they are alluding to... (a NON-animated version of course)....so here's a hint in picture form:


Wednesday, April 30, 2008

The Death of Sports?





Professional Sports are dying. At least, I think they're on the edge of something bad, unless drastic changes are made.
How do I know this? First of all, apparently televised sports have become so boring and run-of-the-mill that the networks had to resurrect AMERICAN GLADIATORS of all things. Also, Baseball used to be our "national pastime". By the 70's, Basketball started to make a big impact on the sports scene- and let's not forget Pro Football edging out basketball in the 90's. Soon this too will change. Here's a list of some sports below, and the various problems I see with them. MY humorous "fixes" for the sports are at the bottom of this blog.


Baseball: What killed baseball? Some would take a bat and beat me on the head saying that it's still very much alive. However, I don't see prime-time preempts for baseball games on TV anymore like when I was a kid. You have to get cable to even see a game anymore. Even event ticket prices should tell you how it's doing. Last time I WENT to a ballgame was only $10 to get in- and that was the GOOD seats.
The death of baseball started in the 70's and early 80's with the onslaught of the new "pumped" players. These overmuscular players hit the ball over the fence all the time, and their outfield counterparts hardly ever drop a catch. Blame steroids, or just thick-headed jocks, but all the home runs and instant outs have made the game, well...boring. Baseball used to be played by blokes who also had regular 9-5 jobs (or at least, part time somewhere else). They'd make you think- hey, hes just a regular Joe like me. There was strategy in the game, not just "run fast, hit hard". But anymore, it's just a guy running in a circle. (or most of the time, not even making it to first).
Occasionally Baseball would pop back in the limelight briefly. For example, Sosa & McGuire home run war- but even by the end of that, people really didn't care WHO finally beat the record. I remember there was more of a stir about the record-winning ball not being given back by the fan who caught it, than by who actually HIT the ball.
As for what can be done to fix this problem in baseball? Weight limit caps. -under 200 lbs should be the cap. That would knock off the steroid freaks, and pave the way for interesting games again.

Basketball- Basketball is currently in it's "death-throes". It's still highly popular- but only because football has an off-season, and sports fans turn on basketball like a hungry pack of wolves.
The main problem I see with basketball is player's salaries. They need to permanently cap ALL salaries at 25 Million or less. What the hell can a college dropout buy with 50+ Million that you CAN'T buy with 25?? Besides, endorsements will bring in more cash for them on the side anyways, so why are you paying them so much at the arena? All that high salaries cause is for them to have more games and higher ticket prices to cover the salaries. But the players are playing more games, so they want higher salaries....see the loop?? Eventually we're gonna see a basketball game every night. Then the popularity will sharply drop off. again, it's the "boring" factor, causing attendance to drop, teams to bankrupt... They're already starting year-round basketball now!!
Another thing they need to fix is the playoffs. They need to take a page from football or hell, college basketball. In the playoffs, teams should play each other ONCE, then you're out if you lose. The ONLY reason they have the 'best of 7' crap is to cover players salaries- stretching out ticket prices and advertisements over 7 games and not just one. Fix the salaries, you'll fix basketball.

Football: Football is at it's peak right now. The leagues have done things right. Keeping televised interest high with the clever use of "funny commercials", the playoffs are elimination-based, salaries aren't TOO crazy -you do have a few up there, but for the most part, the leagues have good caps. Great halftime shows in the Superbowl help keep the viewer locked into that channel. Plus, the sport itself is always a mystery. One dropped ball in football can sway the tide to the underdog. And, just because you run the correct pattern, things may NOT go correctly. It keeps every game 'interesting'. What I can see in the long run, is if Baseball or Basketball gets their act together and becomes our nations "#1 sport" again, football will have trouble keeping it's advertising- which is what pays the players. However, I don't see this happening anytime soon.

Golf: Golf's popularity swings up and down (no pun intended.) ;) It was big back in the day with Robert Palmer and Jack Nicklaus and the "gold jacket guys". It disappeared in the late 80's and early 90's, until fresh blood came in with Tiger Woods and Anika Sorenstam. Eyes, and fans, are slowly turning back to the 'ol Scottish game. I don't see it ever being as big as football - it's not a very "exciting" sport to watch. But I don't see it disappearing forever either. I think it will continue to wax and wain in popularity forever.

Car Racing: I cringe to even put this on the list. I personally (notice I said 'personally') don't consider this a "sport". To me, it's more akin to dog or horse racing. Plus now, cars driving in a circle for 4 hours can only be fun if you consume beer to dull your intelligence, and 'yuk-yuk' with your buddies between laps.
Open-wheel racing, to me, died when the IRL took over Indy Racing. Gone are the days when the races were exciting because someone had a new type of engine or car design to race with. IRL clamped the rules down to make thing's "fair" so that the idiots with hardly any sponsors could compete with the guys who had all the cash to buy whatever they needed. It's boiled the Indy series down to "who can hold the wheel left better than the others", and NOT about what RACING is all about: Who's CAR is better.
Nascar has become extremely popular in recent years, but I think it's reached a plateau itself. Anymore, most people go to the races to see a wreck, and not a race. For me, Nascar is even more boring than the rule-restrictive Indy series. The cars go slower (hard to get used to 100+ mph races when I'm used to watching 200+ mph ones), and they wreck more, causing yellow flags to be out for hours, slowing the cars on the track down even MORE. *yawn* Tell me, how can Nascars, going SLOWER, get in MORE wrecks than cars going twice their speeds?? I'm STILL confused on that one.
But, I DO see the popularity out there. I see Nascar staying the same over they years. It's got a solid & loyal fanbase. I don't see it declining a lot, unless something about the tracks or rules is changed to piss people off. I'm still hoping for that resurgence of Indy racing... minus all the car spec rules.

----------
FIXES:

Well, What can we do about the sports of today? Take a page from the movies Starship Troopers or Running Man- put some more 'danger' in the sports to get people to watch- here are MY suggestions to take extreme sporting into the future!

Baseball- You're allowed to carry your bat with you around the field to use on opposing team players near you. Give the basemen gloves with spikes on them so they can fight back. Plus, the ball is weighted on one side- letting it fly wobbly or roll funny - so it's harder to hit, catch, or throw.

Basketball- take out the "foul" system. you're allowed to trip, elbow, punch or kick your way around the court- ONLY if you have the ball. Also- hogging the ball should be discouraged. Each player has only got 10 seconds to pass or shoot, before the built-in-taser sends a debilitating jolt thru the ball, knocking you out.

Football- We should liven up the mystery of the game with randomly buried land-mines. Plus, the ball is a bomb, set to go off randomly thruout the game. This should bring back the lost art of "lateraling".

Golf- How about making more than just sand or water hazards? Lava, crushed-glass, and rattlesnake pits would be interesting. Oh, and if you don't make it in on par, it becomes full-contact golf on the green with your rivals until you putt it in.

Racing- I'm taking a page out of the new Speed-Racer movie: ramps, loops, and drop-offs would make exciting additions to any track. Plus, all racers hate the "wall", so why not make it more dangerous too? have sections suddenly swing out or pop up from the ground for an 'instant roadblock' effect to avoid!

Anyone else have any ideas or comments???

Monday, April 21, 2008

The Summer of Heros!


I am all pumped up for this summer's round of 'hero' movies. Here's a list of the upcoming ones...with links!! Not all are traditional "superhero" movies... but hey- they still look awesome!

Indiana Jones: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull- YAAAY!! It's about time! Altho undoubtedly the last Indy film with Harrison Ford, I still have been waiting for this one for quite a while! The previews look awesome...AND...we get to meet Indy's SON!

Forbidden Kingdom- I went and saw this one last weekend. I highly recommend it for fans of wire-style Kung-Fu films, as well as anyone who knows the legend of the "Monkey King". Good action, effects, and the lead boy character wasn't annoying!

Iron Man- Every preview I see of this makes me want to see it more. I wasn't sure about Robert Downy Jr. as the lead, but it seems as if he did a bang-up job...we'll see...


Wanted- I never heard about this one till I saw a preview for it- and it looks awesome! (ok a liiiittle far-fetched, but hey, what action movie now a days ISN'T?). It kina looks like a secret assassin group with superhuman "powers". Just watch the preview (trailer) on the site- you'll be hooked. OH YEAH..and ANGELINA JOLIE. what else needs to be said? LOL

Hellboy 2: The Golden Army- Sweet! loved the first one, probably gonna love this one!!!

Speed Racer- Liked the cartoon, hopefully will like the movie. Kim wants to go see this one in IMAX.

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince- Need I say more? Harry Potter, Man!!!

Chronicles of Narnia 2: Prince Caspian- Looking forward to this one too- loved the first movie. (I've read the ENTIRE series- hope they make them all!)

Star Trek (XI)- ??? looks like a "prequel", or maybe 'how Kirk got the Enterprise'..or something... *sigh* after the horrible "enterprise" series I'm kinda wary...

Batman: The Dark Knight- If it's as good as Batman Begins, I'll be a happy camper! Altho it is also sad, knowing this is Heath Ledger's last appearance.

James Bond 22: Quantum of Solace- WTF is up with the title? there's no "live, die, day" or any of the other normal words in it! LOL I'm seeing it anyways.

Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D- It uses the same 3D filming technique as 'Beowulf 3D' did...so I'm definitely going to go see it just for THAT.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine- YESSSSSS!! Finally, a stand-alone Wolverine Movie! SOO going to this one!

Hulk- Good! Glad to see they aren't leaving the crappy Hulk movie alone- they're giving Hulk a makeover! Ed Norton is Bruce Banner!

And here's a list of other movies in the works and being filmed right now! Sorry, none have "official" sites yet, but I added some info links if you're interested in them.

G.I. Joe LIVE ACTION!
Terminator 4: Salvation
The Hobbit (prequel to Lord of the Rings)
The Mummy 3: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
Angels & Demons (prequel to Da Vinci Code)

Are there any coming out that YOU are excited to see? Let me know!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Pizza Dude's got 30 Seconds...


Pizza dude's got 30 seconds...

After much discussion with a friend today about the various Pizzerias around town, I guessed it was time to jot down my opinions about all of the various good 'ol Pizza-Pies.

I'll list them from my worst to my favorite. Don't get me wrong tho, just because somethings not down further on the list doesn't mean it isn't worth the trip- Pizza is the "sex" of the food world- when it's bad, it's still pizza.
(check the links out if you're hungry!)

Non-Pizza restaurant Pizza: There's a reason why you guys aren't a pizza place, but just serve it on the menu. Stick to the other stuff, will ya?

Uno's: Too much sauce, crust was greasy and floppy (and it was PAN sized!), there was a HALF of a tomato on our pizza as well as various other toppings the chefs forgot to cut into better-manageable pieces. Price was high for the "value".

Noble Romans: They have really let themselves go. too much franchising i think. I miss the Purple Monster commercials. Pizza's "ok", but there are other, better places. Their prices are climbing too. (and they failed at the "Tuscano's Subs" too- they're expensive, and not tasty!)

Frozen Pizzas: The "redheaded stepchild" of pizzas, but, amazingly- if you buy some extras- add some shredded cheese, a few extra pepperonis, some mushrooms or olives, and presto- cardboard becomes almost passable. Good in a sinch if you want a whole pizza but only have two bucks and a fridge full of extras.

School Lunch Pizza: 'So bad it's good' is why it's climbed up the list a little. It's the "cult classic" of all pizzas. Throw some salt on these rectangle-cut thin slices, and you'll have a quick meal for any Friday- and again on Monday!!! Besides- who Doesn't remember pizza day with fondness?

Showbiz (Chucky Cheeze): School lunch Pizza's younger, slightly fresher, cousin. They tried to go for a "pizza King" style pizza, but fell short. But hey- you're not there for the pizza- you're there to blow thru your allowance in tokens!

Roselli's- A place at 106th & Michigan Rd. It's OK pizza, but the sauce is a little different (tangy sweet, perhaps?) that kept me from ranking it higher. Also- price for value is a little low, too- ESPECIALLY at lunchtime on the pizza buffet- they only bring out maybe 2 pizza choices, and a "dessert pizza"- for $9!.

Papa Johns: Fresh ingredients? you bet- but the peppers are still too crunchy sometimes, the crust seems to be BREAD and not crust, and the sauce- well, sometimes there's a flood dripping off the edge, and sometimes the dough is only slightly pink with a thin layer of it. I think consistency (i.e.- knowing what you're getting) keeps this from climbing the list in my book. Value for the price is OK sometimes, and other times too high- depending on how they made your pizza that day.

CiCi's: Is good for if you want a LOT of different types of pizza, fast. The pizzas themselves are hurriedly made, so their quality isn't exactly fine-dining, but there's enough different types rarely seen other places (such as spinach alfredo pizza, chicken BBQ pizza, & Cheeseburger pizza) to keep one's interest. The value for price is great- all you can eat buffet!!!

Pizza Hut: Has slipped in the past years. They had the market cornered in the late 70's/early 80's, but i think they are now more like the "fast food" of pizzerias- Fills your belly, and you can honestly say "that was good", -but set a better quality pizza next to a pizza-hut one, and chances are, the Hutt will be eaten last. Like others- prices are getting higher here.

Domino's: I like them because they are the "generic" pizza makers. I mean, if you say "peperoni pizza"- the picture that comes to your mind IS domino's hand-tossed peperoni. Dough, sauce, cheese, and then the toppings of your choice scattered on- not too much, not to thin. No frills and lack of super-fresh ingredients keep them from being near the top, but I like the fact you KNOW what you are getting, every time.

Pizza King: School Lunch Pizza's brother on 'roids. The toppings are the only thing that throw me- I like to know what I'm eating, but pizza kings toppings have been thru a blender, then just coated on the top. is that a tomato, chunk of peperoni, or a pepper? it's red, small and cube-shaped, so it could be anything. Price for value is a little steep, but the pizzas seem to be more "filling" because of the topping-mash. Spicy ingredients and availability keep this one closer to the top of the list.

Donato's: Some good-eating pizza, if you like spicy pizza. even the cheese pizza is spicier than it really should be. Their peperoni pizza is one of my favs, but is WAY greasy, and the spiciness combine into an evening of heartburn and MORE for me. value for the price is good, and ingredients seem fresher than some other places.

Godfather's: Man, I miss them around here. They were the place to get pizza when I was a little kid. What happened to them in the area? The pizzas themselves were similar to Domino's, but with what seemed to be better toppings, and the crust was just right. Can't comment on the price- never paid for it, I was too young. :P

Sbarro: Some awesome-eating mall pizza. They have The "huge" slices that I'm a fan of. Even tho the crust is a little floppy on the thinner pizzas, the flavor is impressive. Usually a good selection of different types. Value for price is pretty good.

Lucca Pizza: I have it on good authority that a guy knows a guy who knows that Lucca is owned by THE "Family". And it shows- Awesome ingredients, great crust, old-world style taste, and good selection. Only thing keeping this from the top of my list is availability- You don't see them hardly anywhere anymore. Price for value is equal.

Little Caesar's: I miss that little funny roman guy! And the pizza too! *(update)* It seems Little Sneezers has been making a comeback with a new idea- Pizza as "fast food!" They offer ready-made LARGE pizzas for $5! drive up, pay 5$, and drive away with a pizza- no wait! I tried this hoping for the old Little Caesar's quality...and was severely disappointed. They've changed some sauce recipes, and the crust is more doughy. (not undercooked, just more bread-like). However, price for value (and time getting the pizza) exceeds expectations, so they still are near the top for a fast, cheap, and somewhat tasty pizza. *also* see " Hungry Howies" for more little Caesars info!

Papa Murphy's: Frozen Pizza's bigger, tastier, fresher, and better cousin! Combine a menu list of a bazillion pizzas & ingredients with the fact you control how done you like your OWN crust (it's a take-home-and-bake pizza store), equals some awesome pizza-eating! Value for price is exceptional!

Hungry Howie's: I have it on good authority that Hungry Howie's Pizza (founded as a different company long ago) got a hold of SOME the recipes for ...(or hired an ex-high-ranking person of)... *drumroll* Little Caesars. Their Pizza is awesome. Great taste, good toppings, and hey, they even have Crazy Bread...um... I mean, "Howie Bread"...in a myriad of flavors and toppings. Good value for the price, and they are QUICK on the making of your pizzas!

Goodfella's Pizza: This shot up to the top of my list after only ONE pizza. We went to the one located on Olio road in Geist. The crust is amazing, and i think, is one of the biggest contributors why its tops on my list. the toppings were all so full of flavor. and the sauce was perfect- just tomato-y enough, but not to goopy or spicy to detract from the other tastes. I can see this place falling down my list a few notches (but not too far) as I eat there more, because their list of toppings was kinda small (altho they did have some of the more "unusual" toppings like Provolone cheese or Prosciutto ham.), and they only had two or so 'styles' of pizza. Their menu has tons of other Italian food items, but they insist they were a pizzeria first. Value for the price was ok- but only because the $25 for one pizza is WORTH it there, at least once in a while. - It's no wonder they've been voted "Best Pizza in the World" several times!

So- Anyone out there agree or disagree? What are some of YOUR favorites? Comment me! :)

Monday, March 31, 2008

BLOG HASH: There is no Dog, only Zuul!



Original Post Date: Friday December 2, 2005

For those of you that know me, you all know i do NOT spout religious dogma or the like. But someone asked me what my true beliefs were, and I wrote the following fable to show EXACTLY how I believe the divine is. It's kinda long, so pull up a chair....

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Agog and His Search

By: Eric Craig

Once, there was a man named Agog. He was a normal man in every respect, except one. He really wanted to know the truth about the divine. He wanted to know soo bad, he always stayed up late at night, pouring over books about religion, God, and all of it's aspects. He didn't find anything that rang true to him as a definite answer to the question- what is God? He fell asleep extremely late one night right on top of his books.

"GOD WAS HERE!" Agog woke with a jump, and looked out of his window early the next day. There was a well-dressed preacher, running through the street, crying in happiness, screaming "GOD WAS HERE!" Agog went outside and stopped the preacher.

"God was here? Where did he go?" Agog asked.

Sobbing and pointing up the road, the preacher smiled. "Yes! That way!" and before Agog could ask what God looked like, the preacher ran off in the other direction, spreading his words.

Agog took off up the road. By-and-by, he came upon a tall, gruff looking man with a beard sitting on the side of the road. The bearded man was looking at a little pile of wood blocks, with funny letters carved upon them. Agog asked him, "Have you seen God? What did he look like?". The bearded man beamed. "Aye, I did. He was a tall warrior. He had wild white hair, carried an oak staff, and it seemed as if the seas would bow before him, for you could almost hear the waves. And he gave me these..." The bearded man pointed at the small pile of blocks. Agog took off running up the road, anxious to finally meet God.

By-and-by, Agog came upon another man, this one was walking up the road, wearing long grey robes, and walking with a staff. He thought this might be God, so he called out "God?". The man turned around, and Agog saw that he wasn't the old warrior the bearded man described. "Hardly!" the robed man laughed. "But he just flew by, a while ago." This stopped Agog. "Flew?" he asked. "Yes. God is a giant dragon. He slowed just long enough to wrap his huge wings around me for a protection blessing. He then took to the sky, and with a mighty roar, breathed fire into the air, and departed." Agog believed the robed man, for he still could smell the heavy smoke in the air. Agog took off running up the road, scanning the sky for a glimpse of God.

By-and-by, as Agog was running, he tripped over an old woman kneeling and praying in the road. "Sorry," Agog apologised, "I was looking for God." The old woman brushed herself off and chuckled, "That's Ok, God teaches forgiveness. But He wasn't in the air, he walked with me, and even helped me for a while." Again confused, Agog asked, "What did he look like?" The old woman smiled, "He was a handsome young man with long hair. He wore white robes, and had holes in his wrists. He had died for us, but now he walks among us again! He even changed my waterbag into the finest wine!" Agog, thirsty for more knowledge, took off running up the road again.

By-and-by, Agog ran right pass a young woman leaning against a tree. He stopped and turned to her, "Have you seen the God walk by?" The woman looked at him, "THE God? Silly, don't you know God is TWO people?" Agog froze in his spot, "Two?" "Yes," she continued, "Two. A noble Lord and a beautiful Lady. The Lord shone with the brilliance of the sun, while the Lady sparkled with the coolness of the moon. They taught me many things, and as they walked around in a circle, all the plants grew!" Sure enough, Agog looked around, and all the plants had wildly overgrown in the area, brimming with beautiful flowers. There was even a ring of toadstools growing about the young woman. Agog took off running up the road, once again.

By-and-by, Agog came upon a young man, dressed only in a loincloth, painting pictures right upon the ground.. "Have you seen God?" he asked. The young man stood, "Yes. The Great Spirit was with us today." "Us?" Agog asked. The young man pointed off the side of the road. There, playing together, were a bear, a wolf, a deer, and a horse. Agog was amazed. "What did God look like?" The young man spread his arms wide to the sky, "The Great Spirit is over all. He is everywhere. He is invisible. Sometimes he's in a tree, sometimes an arrow. He helps us grow in peace, and even protects us from enemies." Agog was unsure if he could see something invisible, but took off up the road nonetheless.

Agog came upon many other people on the road. They were old, young, man, woman, and of many different races. But all had seen God. He continued so far up the road, that he wasn't even sure where he was, and the sun was starting to set. Agog turned for home to continue looking through his books, when he heard a voice say his name. "Agog, why do you give up?" He turned, and saw himself sitting on a boulder by the road. Agog stood transfixed. He did not have any siblings or family alive, so this could not be a relative. "Are you God?" Agog asked. "Yes." God stated simply. Agog approached him gingerly. "I have been looking for you for a long time. I have met a lot of people who have seen you or know you, and they all give me descriptions, but they all saw something different." God stood and put his hand on Agog's shoulder. "Everyone sees Me differently because they know where to look for Me. They know when they have found Me, and accept Me how they see Me. " Agog hung his head sheepishly, and asked "Then why do you look exactly like me?" God playfully pushed Agog's shoulder, and crossed his arms with a smirk, "Because you are still seeking me. You know where to find me now. So go there!" Agog looked up at God, and mirrored his smirk. "You're right...I do!" Agog took off down the road, and ran all the way home. He burst into his room, and hurriedly shuffled through all his books, stopping on one. "There you are!" Agog exclaimed with glee. He put the rest of the books upon his shelf, and happily read.

The moral of the story is: What book did Agog choose? That is what we each have to decide for ourselves.

BLOG HASH: Scenes from a video-store...



Original Post Date: Wednesday February 15, 2006

I used to be a manager of a local Blockbuster Video store. I was reminiscing today about old jobs and dealing with the general public (thank the gods I currently do NOT work in a customer service job anymore). Here are some TRUE stories of "Eric: Manager from Hell"...

__________________________________________

Set up: Blizzard conditions. I was the ONLY employee/manager who lived close enough who could make it in. One of the busiest renting days- between Christmas & New years. I was ALONE on shift for 6 hours, a customer line to the back wall of the store, and a HUGE pile of returns I hadn't gotten to yet...

Man: ..."the late-fees are just unacceptable. I want to talk to the manager!"

Me: "Not a problem, sir." *spins around slowly 360 degrees* "Can I help you? I'm the manager."

Man: *obviously peeved* "That's it. I'm taking my money somewhere else!"

Me: "I don't think the multimillion dollar corporation will miss your $3.25 today, sir."

Man: "Well, I'm never coming back here AGAIN!"

Me: "That's OK sir, the worst possible thing you could do to me WOULD be to come back again. Have a nice day."

...for about an hour after that incident- every customer in line was pleasant and paid thier late fees without question....and dont ask me how 400 customers that day could make it in to the store, but not another single employee couldn't....

_____________________________________________________

Set up: A mother and her 15 year old daughter walks up to the counter. The mother is in her early 40's, the daughter is very physically developed...

Woman: "My daughter is having a sleep-over tonight. Why is this rated 'R'? Does this movie have any nudity in it? *hands me the movie BLADE (Westley Snipes)*

Me: "No, but there are some decapitations, extreme violence, and people getting covered in blood."

Woman: "Oh...but no nudity, right?"

Me: *looking dumbfounded* "No...but you'd have your daugher and her friends watch someone being gutted, rather than see something they look at in the shower every day?"

Woman: *serious, matter-of-fact tone* "Exactly, they don't need to see that yet."

Me: *even more confused, quietly rents out BLADE to them*

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Set Up: Woman hurridly brings up her 3 yr old son to the counter...

Woman: "My son just threw up on your children's section, I'm sorry. He was extremely ill today, so I wanted to take him out to get a movie."

Me: *perterbed for not leaving a SICK CHILD at home* "That's ok- hang on a sec-" *reaches under counter and holds out a roll of paper towels to woman*

Woman: "I'm NOT going to clean up my son's vomit!"

Me: *now confused AND perterbed* "Then I'm not going to rent you that movie."

...woman storms out. I wish she HAD cleaned it up- evidentally it was projectile vomit down the WALL, behind a ton of movies sitting on the shelves. Luckily I'M the manager- and I had other employees to 'delegate' things to that day...

________________________________________

Set Up: Late one night. the store had just closed at midnight. luckily there were no other customers in the store milling about, so I locked the doors exactly on 12:am. ...ten minutes later...

Man: *bangs rudely on window to get my attention, yells thru glass* "Sir?"

Me: *walks over to glass near drop-box* "Yes?"

Man: *puts video in drop box* "Check that in now, so it's not late."

Me: *WAS going to check it in for him, but he was rude and bossy* "I'm sorry, it's 10 past midnight."

Man: "You're telling me that since it's only 10 minutes late, you'll charge a fee?"

Me: "Yes, I'm sorry, but all videos are due by Midnight."

Man: "There should be some leeway for people who drop it off close to the due time!"

Me: *being sarcastic* "Like a cut-off time for when it's actually late?"

Man: "Yes, like a final deadline"

Me: *amused now* "OH, i forgot- there IS a cut-off time!"

Man: *hopeful* "Really? what is it so i know for next time?"

Me: "Midnight"

Man: *confused* "But...."

Me: *lying my ass off* "The tapes are ACTUALLY due at 11:50 pm, we just don't tell anyone- we give everyone 10 minutes leeway, so the cutoff time is Midnight."

Man: *pissed that he missed even the leeway* "Well, that's just stupid" *starts walking to car*

Me: "I think this is stupid, too, sir."

...I ended up checking it in for him and waving the late fees anyways- he amused me.

_______________________

Employees loved me, customers hated me, other managers wanted to be me (and get away with saying what they WANTED to). I worked for good Ol' Blockbuster for 6 years, and accumulated many funny tales. I am also one of the only managers to be blacklisted for re-employment. ...But thats a story for ANOTHER day...

BLOG HASH: Who's down with OCD? Yeah, you know me!



Original Post Date: Wednesday April 12, 2006

Well, I don't know why (perhaps a blog is another type of OCD), but it's time to scare you all again!

I'm posting some personal info anbout myself, that maybe even my WIFE doesn't know. (don't worry- not THAT personal)

I have some OCD behaviors. I'm hoping that you'll read the list- and either get a good laugh- or post a comment with your own quirks...or possibly stop talking to me...

heres just SOME of the odd things I do- and YES, all are TRUE. However, I'm not super-bad at things like the really freaky people you see or hear stories about. If I don't do one of my "quirks" when I have the chance, I only obsess over it for several seconds, and then I can forget it and move on. I DON'T "have" to stop what I'm doing to go back and "fix" things....:

1. Before going to bed, I have to check the alarm clock 3 times in rapid succession to make sure it's set on the right wake time, in the AM, and that the alarm is truly turned on.

2. When showering, if I turn around in one direction, I have to "unwind" in the opposite direction as many # of turns as I did.

3. When I hear things on the radio such as "the London Stock Exchange" or "the Burtrold Business of Landscaping and Architecture", I have to spell the acronym in my head (eg: L-S-E, or B-B-L-A)

4. when composing any email (or blog), I re-read it. Several times. Then, AFTER sending it, I re-read the original email sent to me, followed my my response I just sent. I guess it's to make sure I didnt miss anything.

5. My DVD, VHS, (& CD) collection is in perfect alphabetical order, except that all sequels/prequels are together, reguardless of alphabetization, starting where the first movie would be (eg: all "Indiana Jones" movies are under "Raiders of the Lost Ark")

6. When locking/closing any door behind me I have to re-check the lock/handle to make sure it's actually closed, at least once more.

7. Speaking of movies- when I see a movie, I have to watch any sequel/prequel that comes out after it, reguardless of how crappy the first movie was.

8. I push down ALL of the little bubble-indicators on top of my fast-food soda cups whenever I get one. (this one has a good side effect- it helps identify my cup when eating out in a large group)

9. It REALLY bugs me to have pictures on my digital camera. I have to download them ASAP, organize them into thier proper folder on the hard drive, and wipe the cameras memory clean.

10. I have to at least ATTEMPT to pet every dog/cat that I come across during a day.

11. When I eat hot-dogs, each hot dog w/bun gets only ONE packet of ketchup, each. (If I don't have "packets" and only a bottle, it gets one stripe down each side of the bun where the bun & dog meet)

12. I like to stack things. Biggest/heaviest on bottom, smallest/lightest on top.

13. similar to #12, I have to organize books on the bookshelf from biggest to smallest. Weird that I don't put them in ABC order like my movies. Don't ask...I don't know why either.

14. When drinking soda/water from a plastic bottle, I have to put the cap back on after every drink. (I don't think it's a germ-thing, I just don't want to lose the cap- again, don't know why)

15. I like to make things even. (eg.: If I see 2 bowls with 3 pieces of candy in one, and 5 in the other, I have to even them out. I discard or eat the odd pieces.)

16. LOL - I like to number things when I list them. Or use the "outline" form when organizing a grocery list or my thoughts in a notebook.

17. I like to fill out forms. All boxes and blanks must be full, even if it's with a "N/A"

18. All of my clocks/watches/timekeepers/computers have to be syncronized to the second. (My wife has done wonders on helping me get "out" of this one...I cant remember the last time we were early to something) ;) *smack* ow...sorry honey....

19. I can't stand the feeling of suede, velvet, things lightly fuzzy like that. When I touch it, my hands get a feeling similar to what your ears do as nails go down a chalkboard. I then have to quickly touch something glass, plastic, or rougher to get rid of the feeling (to "wipe it off"). This may be a texture-thing and not an OCD, but it's a quirk, nonetheless.

20. Text has to be left-justified, right justified, or centered. Several tabs in on one line and then only a few spaces in on the next is not allowed.

21. I really dont have ANY germ or cleaning phobias like normal OCD'ers, but the closest thing I guess I have is underneath my fingernails has to be cleaned out at east daily, or whenever I happen to see dirt under them. Maybe thats just good hygene.

22. I have a large vocabulary, but I'm a horrible speller, so I have to spell-check ALL my works. (the fact that Yahoo blog doesn't offer this bugs the crap outta me- and I even try to re-read my blog 6 or 7 times, but STILL miss miztaykes). :)

23. <----- the fact that some of these numbers distend in this particular font bugs the crap outta me too. I want the bottom to be even.

24. I frequently get songs (usually just the chorus or a few lines) stuck in my head, and they play over...and over...and over...and over....all day.. and even when I haven't heard that particular song that day. I can stop it quicker if I actually hear the entire song played somewhere.

25. I find it difficult to fall asleep if there's wrinkled blankets under my feet. Again, maybe a texture issue....

26. I also find it hard to fall asleep if there's a room light on anywhere else in the house (outdoor patio lights too), even if I can't see it from the bedroom. I KNOW it's on. (Nightlights or clock-displays don't count) Drapes, doors, windows, and other "closeables" have to all be closed as well.

27. Crayons, markers, paint, etc. has to be organized in one of 2 ways (depending on how many shades of color I'm organizing)- A.- Lightest to Darkest, or B.- ROYGBIV (according to the visual light spectrum).

28. Yes, I'm also one of those guys who outlines the tools hanging on the garage wall. And I give the typical answer too: "so I know what's missing". :)

29. This isnt an OCD, but I can NEVER FRIGGIN REMEMBER the correct way to spell: those (thoes), their (thier), awnser (answer), organise (organize), and a few other words like that, NO MATTER HOW MANY FRIGGIN TIMES I FIND OUT THE CORRECT WAY!....*sigh*

30. Chairs, knick-nacks, appliances, etc. should be arranged at 45 dgree angle increments, whenever possible. (I don't freak out if they get moved from it, I just postition it that way the FIRST time I organize something).

31. I have to push all of the creepy "singing toys" in a toy isle when I go down it. OK, this isn't an OCD, it's to bug/embarrass my wife. :)

32. I like to end lists on an even number, whenever possible. (I added the non-OCD one above just to even this list out.)

Well, do I scare you? Or make you say- Hey...I do that.....

Post some comments!!!

Friday, March 28, 2008

BLOG HASH: Year Of The Zombie!



Original Post Date: Thursday May 31, 2007


Are you a Zombie aficionado like me? Well, if so- 2007 will soon become the "Year of the Zombie!" (dubbed by me, first, right here!)
Here are some upcoming films this summer dealing with our friendly neighbourhood flesh-eaters:

28 Weeks Later: Sequel to 28 Days Later . British film. Not truly 'zombies' per-sae, but "rage infected people". I saw this one already and give it a thumbs-up, if you've seen the first one.

Day of the Dead: Yes, Romero made this one already, but like the others ( night and dawn) had, this one's the NEW remake of it!! Can't wait! (after last years land of the dead, i was disappointed in the franchise, and was hoping for more...)

Diamond Dead: Sounds like an odd cult-classic. Some lady has to kill 365 people, but enlists the help of a friend who was killed and is now a zombie....dunno about this one...

Diary of the Dead: Romero overseeing a Blair-witch like zombie movie. Weather it will be seen from the eyes of the cameras that the actors have with them (group of filmmakers in the woods making a horror movie gets attacked by zombies), or in the normal 3rd perspective, we'll wait and see. Takes place during the same night as the " night of the living dead" remake.

Fido: A zombie-comedy in the vein of "Shaun of the Dead " (LOVED S.O.T.D.). Set in 1950's post-zombie war America, where zombies have been domesticated thru the use of a special collar...

Grindhouse: A Quintin T. double-feature movie, in his normal blood-and-grit style. One of the movies, 'planet terror', has people defending themselves from zombie (like) creatures. Haven't seen this one yet- I'll let you know...

Out of Space : In the future we run out of landfill room, and the resulting waste and radioactivity creates hordes of zombies that plague the living.

Outpost: a Scottish film of a group of military people that are exploring an island devastated by WWII, and find a "survivor" of some horrible experiments...

Plane Dead: hehehe...a "remake" of snakes on a plane, except instead of snakes......wait for it.......ZOMBIES! I can't tell if this is supposed to be a true horror, or a tongue-in-cheek horror comedy like S.O.T.D.). One would hope...

Resident Evil: Extinction: Yeah baby! the 3rd in the resident Evil series! See the first 2 if you haven't already, before wading thru this one.

Zombie Town : If you've seen "Slugs" or the more recent "Slither", it's similar to these. Creepy parasites get in the heads of people turning them into zombies that attack the living. Again, hopefully a comedy-horror like "Slither"...

Barricade: German film about...you guessed it...campers in the woods being harassed by those damn zombies..

That's all I've run across so far- if you find any more PLEASE let me know!!!
Here's a couple of more things for all you Zombie lovers:
Wikipedia List of Zombie Films
Zombie internet infection simulator

And last but not least- GET THIS BOOK! it will save your life someday!!!
ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE

BLOG HASH: Things I've Learned...



Original Post Date: Thursday February 8, 2007


Now that I'm a daddy, I have been thinking of how I will screw up this poor kid's life by letting them follow my examples... so I have decided to compose an ever-growing list of truths I have learned over the years in order for them to quickly learn NOT to do what daddy does, and to follow his learned wisdom.

1. Your parents, for the most part, DO know what they are talking about. This was the first (and hardest) one for me to learn, personally.

2. Do NOT drink 3 cups of coffee before driving to work on days that you will get stuck in traffic.

3. Also, Milk and alcohol do not mix. EVER. Nor should you drink them even HOURS apart.

4. Kiss as many puppies/kitties as you can. They have a better grasp on life, and you'll need their friendship.

5. It's OK to borrow money- just NEVER from family OR friends.

6. You can never make action figures explode "cool enough" with fireworks, ever. It only leads to disappointment, and the depletion of valuable childhood collectibles.

7. Also- for goodness sakes- keep a COUPLE of your toys unopened, and in mint condition. This goes for comic books too. You never know when you'll need extra college tuition or a down payment on a house.

8. It's OK to verbally defend yourself from verbal attack, just never attack them back. You never know when you might be in a situation for that person to help you in a time of need.

9. NEVER pick on the geeks or the nerdy. You never know when they will become your boss, or you will need your computer fixed.

10. You CAN NOT paraschute out of your bedroom window with a sheet. TRUST me.

11. While extremely funny and interesting, unless you OWN the microwave and don't care, never put a whole box of Marshmallow Peeps in there. This goes for silverware and pots too.

12. Paste, while an invaluable tool for gluing paper, makes a horrid snack. The results a few hours later are to be avoided.

13. It's not polite to make a beep-beep-beep noise at an extremely overweight person as she attempts to back out of a grocery isle.

14. Do not floor your car's gas while on ice. Aside from the obvious danger sliding around, you may hit dry pavement. Transmissions were apparently NOT designed for that kind of torque difference.

15. Never set anything on fire INSIDE or NEAR a house. Also- Don't shoot fireworks off if there has been a 2 month drought. OK...Just never set ANYTHING on fire, EVER.

16. When something calls for safety glasses (such as shooting a BB gun at a target with a solid concrete backer), go ahead and WEAR them. Looking dumb is the LEAST of your worries.

17. (This one I've learned recently) Don't try to take food from a pregnant lady. Or even talk to a pregnant lady when shes had a bad day. Go ahead and treat them like they are a nuclear device with the clock stopped at .01 seconds...

18. NEVER feed a puppy re-fried beans and leftover taco meat. There aren't enough paper towels in the WORLD....

19. Don't lick a super cold piece of metal. No matter HOW many times you've seen it on T.V.- the results are the SAME as the television, but they only humorously allude to the searing pain you will feel for weeks.

20. Never have sex on a beach WITHOUT PLENTY of towels, no matter how 'spontaneously romantic' you think it would be. Sand is evil.

21. Never try to "jump" your car. Your suspension is NOT the same as the General Lee's.

22. It is NOT cool for little boys to proclaim they like Rainbow Brite to their friends or in public, unless you think they will have a fabulous career as a hairdresser. Also, might want to have them leave their dollies at home, too.

23. DO NOT SWEAR TO YOUR TEACHERS, EVER. No matter how much mommy and daddy do. Yes your family might be cool and use profanity as every-day adjectives, but it's not proper in polite society, and will cause a soapy taste and lots of grounding.

24. Do NOT mouth-off to an officer of the law, even if you THINK you're in the right.

25. Those huge, nasty looking giant Stag Beetles that hold onto objects you stick in front of them pinch HARD - enough to break skin - and they don't let go. Same goes for hermit crabs.

26. Mud pies, while resembling chocolate and are fun to make, are NOT for consumption.

27. Only drink from the hose if YOU are controlling the force at which it is turned on.

28. Diesel cars do NOT like Gasoline. And coincidentally, vise-versa.

29. This one comes from my Grandpa- Keep your tires full, and your oil changed.

30. Dog food & treats were NOT designed with human taste buds in mind.

31. Caller ID has ruined crank calling.

32. Never play water balloon toss in the house. Nor have a squirt gun war. As a matter of fact, ALL water games, outside only.

33. NEVER use the phrase "well then, do it yourself!" with your parents. Also- Never sarcastically say "3!" when parents have already angrily counted to 2...

34. NEVER use silly-string to decorate anything, especially an automobile. Silly string eats paint, and dries harder than diamonds. Repairs are costly.

35. You can NOT outrun a pissed-off dog, no matter HOW small it is.

36. NEVER bring any fauna into the house to show your mother, no matter HOW cute it is. Also- only show dad if you've got some time to kill to learn animal science facts.

37. Never eat/drink something on a dare. This goes for the "3-mile-island" hot wings too. It's just a waste of money, and you'll STILL be hungry.

38. Do not shoot a can of aerosol ANYTHING with a BB gun because you want to see it explode. You are not a military sniper. That's the distance you'll have to be at to avoid any fallout and collateral damage.

39. You are NOT MacGuyver. It's always cheaper in the long run to buy the proper parts, to anything.

40. Items on this list, while possibly humorous, are NOT lies! PLEASE heed them!

this list is still growing...if anyone has any they want to add- post 'em!
:)

BLOG HASH: A Toy Time of Year....



Original post date: Monday December 11, 2006


Well, as it's getting close to gift-giving holiday time, I've been reminiscing about all my old toys and loves of my childhood. You've seen all of those email forwards (Click here if you havent LOL) that take you back down a memory lane trip via the 1980's...well, here's MY little addition- with LINKS! And please, ADD your own (comment) with your favorite 80's things and links!


These are just some of the ones off of the top of my head...Come on- Post yours!!! Links would be a plus, but not necessary...

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

BLOG HASH: Emma's Drinking Song


Original Post Date: Monday October 15, 2007

I wrote a song for my new baby Daughter, Emaline, today..it's sung to the tune of an Irish Jig, or Irish drinking song. I figured that was fitting since shes a lot Irish, and drinks like a fish! (ok , so it's just formula,...but if she's anything like her mum THAT will change!) :)


Emmas Song

Oh, there be highs,
and there be woes,
in the tale of Emma's song!
She's just been born,
it's September four,
so the tale is nar' too long!

Little Emma
gave a cry,
which said, hey world I'm here!
Five pounds and some,
had all her thumbs,
let's celebrate with beer! (Hear-hear!)

The family's gone,
it's time to sleep,
and buckle for the night.
But Em turned blue
and back again
that gave poor dad a fright!

She's ok
and so is dad,
they all begin to sing!
She's a cutie!
Such a doll!
A tiny little thing!

Oh, there be highs,
and there be woes,
in the tale of Emma's song!
She's got bold,
at one week old,
so the tale is nar' too long!

Little Em's
met all her kin,
everyone cheered loud!
Mum gave thanks,
and Em coo-cooed,
'n dad was real proud!

All the presents
are open now,
and in her room they sit,
Poor little thing,
is short of wing,
'nun her clothes do fit!

Mum and dad
has settled in,
happy tears they weep.
They love her so,
and watch her grow,
while lose'n all their sleep!

Oh, there be highs,
and there be woes
in the tale of Emma's song!
A heart of gold,
at four weeks old,
so the tale is nar' too long!

Em and Mum
stay at home
playing all the day.
Poor 'ol Dad
back to work
for meager little pay.

Dad and Mum
are now old hats
knowing what to do.
When the bottles dry
she starts to cry,
or is she full of poo?

Em's grown some
she's seven and one,
some of her clothes now fit!
We finally get
an outfit on,
lookout, up comes the spit!

Oh, there be highs,
and there be woes
in the tale of Emma's song!
It's getting cold,
She's six weeks old,
So the tale is nar' too long!

Hallow Eve is near,
and in their yard
Dad has made a sight!
Trick Treat we'll go
as ghosties glow,
givin' Em a fright!

She's been out,
and she's been back
to every crowded fair.
Fall has come
'n Mum and Dad
take her everywhere.

Her wide blue eyes
and dark brown hair
make people stop 'n smile.
they all confess
they've never seen
an uncommon little child!

Oh, there be highs,
and there be woes
in the tale of Emma's song!
But the highs are hiiiiiigh,
and the woes are niiiiiigh,
and the tale will be so long!
...And the taaale will beee so loooong!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

MOVIE REVIEW: I Am Legend


I rented the newest Will Smith Movie over Easter weekend. Yes, I know it wasn't much of a "holiday themed" movie, but I wanted to see it, and missed it in the theatres.

All-in-all, I give it a fairly good rating. It seems to be a remake of Omega Man (starring good 'ol Chuck Heston). The general premise of this new version is that a scientist engineers a virus to cure cancer in 2009, and by 2012, 90% of the population of the WORLD dies while the remaining 10% have turned into bloodthirsty zombie-like creatures (altho WAY faster than Romero's kind). Only a handful (well, maybe a couple million, but that's a drop in the bucket when looking at the world-wide population) of people are immune to the virus and remain normal. Will Smith's character just happens to be the lead scientist looking for a cure to the virus when the plague started in 2009, and one of the lucky immune people. He also happens to be the last normal person left alive in New York, and as far as he knows, the world.

A few of my friends saw the movie and were disappointed, because the previews showed a lot of action, but the first half of the movie was basically how he survived day-to-day. Hunting, fortifying his house, researching the cure to the virus in his lab, and just dealing with the psychological pressures of being alone for 3+ years. (in one scene, he goes into a video store to get new movies to watch, and has apparently set up mannequins behind the counter and "browsing" in the store- and talks to them as if they were living people, just to not feel alone) I think the social and personal mental aspect statements were lost on my buddies watching the movie- they were looking forward to a shoot-em-up zombie flick. Some of that happens, but mostly in the last half of the movie.

I won't give away any spoilers, but I will say that if you've seen Omega Man, this movie parallels it quite a bit, including the ending.

I highly recommend this movie if you like post-apocalyptic dramas like Omega Man, Last Man on Earth, and a Boy and his Dog. If you are looking for a Resident-Evil gorefest, you might want to skip this one- this movie is more about the emotions of loneliness, fear, and loss than it is about anything else.

BLOG HASH: Baby's New Clothes...

I will begin moving over all my old blog posts from my other blog sites that people found amusing or entertaining. Maybe you missed one? I will start with the most recent ones and work backwards. You'll know it's an old blog- I will put BLOG HASH in the title, as well as the original post date in the body. Hope you enjoy!



ORIGINAL POST DATE- Wednesday March 5, 2008

Now that I've become a guru on baby clothes (ok slight embellishment), I feel it safe to comment on the industry as a whole, with a few itemized problems i have.

1. 3-6 MO. my ASS!
How come, when you buy something that says 3-6 months, sometimes it's made for a premature underfed Ethiopian baby, and other times it's sized for a overeating sumo-wrestler's kid? Yes, like "regular size" people, I know baby's come in all shapes and sizes. well, why not go to a measurement system like adult clothes? like, instead of "3-6 months", make it for "24 inches & up to 15 lbs"..etc. Does the baby-clothes-making-world need me to buy them a tape measure??

2. NOOOO!!! BUTTONS!!!!!! ARRRGH!!!!
I absolutely LOVE snaps, zippers, hell even have a few outfits with nothing but Velcro. but, for the love of all things holy, what the HELL is with the micro-buttons? I have freckles bigger than some of these things, and my giant-like fingers aren't nimble enough to manipulate them to get them open when I'm trying to put the outfit over my kid's head- not to MENTION to get them back closed when the outfit is on a child who wriggles more than the floor of Indiana Jone's Temple.

3. Front....or back????
I never read in the child-instruction-manual about the directional flip-flopping of baby clothes. Sometimes the zipper is in the front. sometimes it's in the back. Hell, i thought i did good and she looked pretty with her button-down (snaps!) dress and big bow on her butt...until my wife pointed out that that happened to be one of the ones that snapped..IN BACK. Ok, Ok..i now know to look for a tag or something printed in the clothes. but why do i have to go on a scavenger hunt for the tag every time i want to dress a baby?

4. "Built-In" panties- with NO flap!
Some of these outfits have cute little built-in bloomers under the dress. while darling and all, this does nothing to ease my anger at having to remove the ENTIRE outfit to change a diaper....and most of these, of course...have micro buttons!!

5. Whys i gotta match?
Daddy's dressing you now, honey. Yes I know baby outfits usually come all matchy in their colors and patterns. Well, if they're not together, i figure it's mix-or-match, right? apparently, according to my wife, that's wrong also. I SOO need baby- grranimals just so _I_ can dress her.

6. Where's your sock??
No matter how tight you roll the tops, or fold them down, or stretch them over her chubby cankles....a sock always comes off 5 minutes later without fail. where are the baby-garters that clip to her diaper?? I offered to use the staple-gun, but my wife ALSO didn't think that was a good idea.

7. New outfit- for me to puke on!
Murphy's law. Get her dressed and ready to look cute for an outing with grandma and grandpa- and 2 minutes before we get there is when she'll spit up, every time. But put her in ratty, ugly sleeper that has stains, and shes fine all day. Do they do it on purpose??? i think they DO...I'm WATCHING her....

That's all i can think of to rant about baby clothes right now...any other parents agree or have other issues?

Monday, March 24, 2008

dood, chk meh 1337

Altho this is my "first" post here, I have many backposts on other blogsites that I will try to re-add here from time - to - time.





Ok...

We've all used text-message abbreviations such as LOL (laugh out loud) and OMG! (oh my gosh)...as well as a million other shorthand typings to be able to send a message quicker "wnt 2 come ovr 4 sum food?". Oh and let's NOT forget all the damn smileys! >:) :) :P
Well, there are 3 other levels of "pseudospeak" that I'd like to share with you today.



The first, if you've ever browsed http://www.4chan.org/ or seen any of the "LOL Cats" pictures, you'll recognise what I'm talking about-"wy yoo luking at meh? am eyes not preddy?" It's an extremely funny- and "cute"- way of captioning pictures with adorable kitties and puppies. However, I've seen it in chatrooms, on posts, and worse yet- even in private emails to yours truly!!! THATS a little annoying. I'm sorry, but it actually takes MORE time to try and type something grammatically in error but phonetically close to the original word. If you're just trying to be 'cutesy' or funny for a response, i say it's OK. but don't type like that for the WHOLE friggin email or post, it makes it look like your mother is your fathers sister. -for all you texters, that means "WT".



The second is the crazy capitalization. anD doNt sAy YOuvE NEveR SEen SomeOne TYpe LikE ThiS. Again, I don't know why- maybe it's the little 'emo' boys and girls trying to get across how distorted their thoughts really are. For those of you in the dark- "emo" is just this decade's way of saying "goth" aka, from MY generation,- "punk"....and for you emo kids screaming at me now, YES it is the same- don't be mad to suddenly find out you're not really all THAT original.



The last is a little more creative, but none the less annoying. "31337", or "1337" for short (pronounced ELEET / LEET...="elite"). It's the hackers and hard-core gamers way of getting info across to each other without any "n00bs" (new-bies) being any wiser. Well, that's how it STARTED OUT when i was back cracking code on the commadore 64. but now, every little geek who thinks they're the $#17 uses it. It's basically a way of using other characters that resemble letters. for example, i use it sometimes when i wanna cuss in an email (like "$#17" above) that's going out to 'family-friendly' people or places. instead of saying 'asshole', I'll type @$$#013. you can still sort of read the word (with a little imagination, the 3 is a backwards E, the 1 is an l, etc...) there are countless ways to type things out in 1337, some more convoluted and intricate than others. here is a basic "alphabet" in just some of the ways to type in this language:


A= 4 /-\ @ ^ /\
B= 8 ]3 ]8 3 8
C= ( {
D= ) [} ) } > [>
E= 3
F= # =
G= 6 9 (_>
H= # - (-) )-( }{ {-} /-/ \-\
I= 1 !
J= _ j
K= < { L= 1 _ M= /\/\ \/ [\/ N= /\/ \ \ O= 0 () P= D * >
Q= 0,
R= 2 ? -
S= 5
T= 7 + ']'
U= (_) _ \_\ /_/
V= \/ \ /
W= \/\/ /\ [/\
X= >< }{ X
Y= '/ %
Z= 2 z

So- anyone out there excessively use any of these???

! /\ ! l_ l_ ) 3 $ 7 ® 0 ¥ ¥ 0 _